I found this in Forsdick’s drawer - Freshly stressed

I found this in Forsdick’s drawer

“Hey.. Bongo?”

“Hey, man! What’s up, dude! “I… you know how we’re moving to the bigger office in Wynberg, right?
“Well… you remember Steve?”

“The dude with the glass eye and the hearing aid?”

“No, that was Charlie.
“Steve’s the weird guy with the super white teeth and the k*k hair style that looked like a rug.”

“Not really, but whatever.
“You sound like something’s wrong.”

“I’m the last guy here, going through everything to make sure we don’t leave anything behind.
“Steve had this–thing in his desk.
“Who knows how long it’s been there.”

“What is it, like a sex toy or something?”

“No.
“I’m pretty sure it’s dead, but–”

“What? What do you mean it’s dead?

“It was coiled up in there like a snake. Like a toy snake, I thought…… just laying around in leaves and dirt.
“Cold, so cold to the touch. And black or dark brown.
“So many legs… far too short to hold its weight up, or maybe not because of–
“It’s fat, too–looks slimy–shiny, but it’s dry.”

“It sounds like you are describing a giant millipede”

“That’s why I called you!

“Crap!”

“What happened?”

“It moved! I dropped it!
“Where did it go!
“Crap! Crap! Crap!”

“Calm down.”
“It isn’t going to bite you or anything.”

“Ow. OW!
“Hand… burnth.”

“You must be allergic to the stuff it secretes when scared.
“Just go wash your hands.”

“RRRGH!
“This really freakin’ burnth!”

“Go wash it off.
“Now.”

“I shtill don’t shee it.”

“Are you okay?”

Yeth! Of courth I’m OK. I thpeak thith way alle time you dick.

Help!