Cell phones and me


Everyone nowadays has a cell phone. Even if we don’t know how to do anything else but make a call or sms. It’s like their lives orbit around that rectangular piece of plastic and technology…and it’s not even a sphere!

I hate to admit it but …I’m one of those people that just can’t part with their phone, every few minutes I’ll be checking my phone. Oh look! I have…zero missed calls, zero new texts, the Facebook frontier is quiet (Yes Facebook, because I’m techno savvy) …

Then I remember I’ve had zero incoming calls, zero texts, and I have four friends on Facebook: wife, mom, dad, and grandma. I used to have five but then grandpa died.

Anyways, I’ll still be sitting there, or standing there, no difference, with my phone, just messing around with it. Bored spitless! Slide up click! Slide back, clack! Slide up click! Slide back clack, click, clack, click ………I have one of those sliding phone thingies.

If you have one you know how addicting it is to just slide the phone back and forth? *click, clack, click, clack* It’s lots of fun.

Suddenly, I get a call from my mom wondering why I called. “Hello?

Oh hi mom!….no I didn’t mean to call you!…no I’m not at a bar right now!…yes I know I don’t have a girlfriend! ….. I’ve been married for 20 years….. to Abigail …… my wife…….of course you’ve met her. C’mon on ma don’t cry, you like her!

NO! do not set me up with someone! Um I really have to go. Yes, at 2AM! How do I know why I need the loo……Love you. BYE!!!”

Later on, I’m going to bed…getting real sleepy… Peep peeeeeeeeep, peep peeeeeeeep, peep peeeeeeeeeep!

I jump out of bed, grab my gun.  I always keep it under my pillow and I’m going around corners like they do in the movies, looking all cool like Horatio. C’mon punk make my day!

I get to the room where I still hear it going off…… Peep peeeeeeeeep, peep peeeeeeeep, peep peeeeeeeeeep!…and I realize it was my phone.

Nothing like an sms alert at full volume at 3 in the morning to get the blood flowing!

Someone actually smsd me! It was…my mom.

Let’s see…I read my mom’s message first. It says that grandma died.

Damn it! Now I only have three friends on facebook. Bloody hell, I must work on that!

Categories: Humour, South Africa | Tags: , , , , , , | 5 Comments

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5 thoughts on “Cell phones and me

  1. As always, a laugh a minute with Roly!

  2. How inconsiderate of Fb friends to die – but one would suppose it is at least a stage better than had they ‘unfriended’ you. :)

  3. You crack me up.I’m rolling on the floor laughing. Ha ha.

  4. Chubby Chatterbox

    I must be one of the few people left on Earth who doesn’t have a cell phone. No one ever calls me so why should I bother? Sigh….

  5. I would friend you on FB Roly! Then your friend total would go back up! I don’t spend a lot of time posting on FB, but I do sometimes run across something that tickles my fancy & I re-post it.
    I have a cell phone that never rings too! But I don’t have a land line. When hubby & I moved to Alberta it didn’t make sense to have a land line because there were just the 2 of us & we needed to have the calls where we were – not going to some answering machine (for the very few calls we do get). The only time I play with my phone is when I want to see the weather though.

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